okay folks. i need help..a lot of help. mostly your opinions, but those help me! i am having SERIOUS conflicts within myself about my major.
p.s. this is mostly me talking to myself and trying to figure out the rest of my life.
(for those of you that dont know, i am going into elementary education, and dont get me wrong, i really REALLY love it. i love the thought of working with kids, i love the thought of having a career to go into right after college, i love the thought of doing what makes me happy for the rest of my life. BUT. i am having problems with this.. so here i go.)
1. i am scared of the parents. i have heard so many horror stories of satan parents that i dont even know if i can handle the thought of even looking at them.
2. i hear it takes over your life. lesson plans everywhere. always trying to plan fun activities. grading papers. decorating. buying supplies. worrying about children. going early, staying late. and getting paid JACK SQUAT for it. always treating everyone like little kids. not being around adults i can relate to.
3. i feel like i wont be challenged intellectually. call me a nerd, but i have this weird obsessing about learning about new things. i sit here and put off my homework to read about weird things, and i collect all my random research. i love learning about religions, (sometimes) philosophy, and other random things that we dont need to talk about. i feel like if i was a teacher i would just be stuck in the same routine of coloring, cut and paste, and paper mache. and while that is WONDERFULLY FUN. i dont know if that's what i want!
4. opportunities. i want to be able to have a lot of them! i want to have options, and exciting things happen to me! i dont wanna be stuck in a classroom, because i feel like if i get my teaching degree that's all i'll be able to do. is teach. i mean, i love it. its fun and such, but i feel like i am getting married to it forever and i wont even be able to like.. i dont know. do normal things.
5. i get nervous thinking about teaching a whole entire class and being responsible for them! there are like seven thousand zillion things that could go wrong, and i'd be the one to blame. and that's not what i like. i like when everyone is happy and nobody says mean things or yells at me.
6. i also read about all these horror stories of the first aid care you'll have to give while being a teacher. (example: a boy had a PENCIL sticking through his leg. all the way. eraser side coming out of his shin. sharpened side coming out his calf. i threw up just thinking about it.)
7. school lunch. even the smell of it makes me heave.
i like the thought of being a teacher because:
1. summers and lots of holidays are off.
2. it makes me happy.
3. it's rewarding. probably one of the most rewarding things ever.
4. (usually) the kids adore you. no matter who you are, or what you do. they love your guts and they want to do everything they can to make you happy.
5. the kids are just adorable.
6. i get the biggest love in my heart when i see a kid. especially when i see them laughing, or playing on a play ground. or just being silly. (i dont mean to sound like a creeper. but they make me so happy!)
7. i know i'll be good at it once i try.
what should i dooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo?! i'm scared of real life. can i major in every single thing in the world? because i also wanna go to culinary school. and make up school. and being cool school. and everything school.
humm. i need to stop sitting in the library. it makes me think too much.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Friday, March 25, 2011
today is my birthday.
so. yesterday i decided it was my birthday today. so i got right to it, and changed my birthday status on facebook.
this is why:
1. i love cake, and i wanted a reason to eat it without thinking of the 14986 pounds i would gain.
2. i wanted an excuse to miss the gym today.
3. i wanted everyone to remember how cool and awesome i am. (remember guys, remember?!)
4. i like tricking everyone.
5. i wanted to see who really remembered my birthday, and who's a facebook PHONY.
6. this weekend seemed like a good weekend to celebrate my awesomeness.
reasons why i'm awesome:
1. i laugh at almost everything
2. i am a good cleaner
3. i am funny.
4. i am nice to almost everyone...usually.
5. i like really great stuff. like cheese. and good music. and boys.
6. i have really awesome dance moves.
7. i dont like stupid things. like baseball and high gas prices.
8. i qualify for food stamps.
9. i am so smart. about everything. i know all the everythings in the world.
10. i am a kick butt at being ungraceful.
11. i am really good at being bossy.
12. i dont eat animals. and thats awesome because they're gross. and it's sad that they die.
13. i have an awesome family.
14. there's a lot more but i dont want you do feel bad about yourself because i'm so awesome.
:)
happy birthday to me. i'mma go buy me some balloons!
this is why:
1. i love cake, and i wanted a reason to eat it without thinking of the 14986 pounds i would gain.
2. i wanted an excuse to miss the gym today.
3. i wanted everyone to remember how cool and awesome i am. (remember guys, remember?!)
4. i like tricking everyone.
5. i wanted to see who really remembered my birthday, and who's a facebook PHONY.
6. this weekend seemed like a good weekend to celebrate my awesomeness.
reasons why i'm awesome:
1. i laugh at almost everything
2. i am a good cleaner
3. i am funny.
4. i am nice to almost everyone...usually.
5. i like really great stuff. like cheese. and good music. and boys.
6. i have really awesome dance moves.
7. i dont like stupid things. like baseball and high gas prices.
8. i qualify for food stamps.
9. i am so smart. about everything. i know all the everythings in the world.
10. i am a kick butt at being ungraceful.
11. i am really good at being bossy.
12. i dont eat animals. and thats awesome because they're gross. and it's sad that they die.
13. i have an awesome family.
14. there's a lot more but i dont want you do feel bad about yourself because i'm so awesome.
:)
happy birthday to me. i'mma go buy me some balloons!
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
sizzle.
if you read this, you HAVE to know. i am not the brightest bulb in the tanning bed. but sometimes i even amaze myself with my stupidity.
once upon a time i was really happy because it was FINALLY warm enough to wear shorts outside. so i did just that. i got my hot pants on and was strutting my stuff all over the place. and then it was friday and i was bored in orem so i decided to go play with my sister and her friend for a while. we ate ice cream and did girl things. it was a jolly good time. THEN my little sisters friend was like "oh hey i think it's a really good idea to curl my hair" and i was all "oh my gosh! i miss doing that! let me do it! please please pleaseeeeee!"
so she did.
except i had to hurry because i had to go and meet some friends at nicklecade. so i hurried and got all done and then stood up from the chair and my stupid shorts got soo wrinkly. and then i was like "whatever i don't have time to iron them! it's fine!" but no. i looked in the mirror and almost ran away from embarrassment of wrinkly shorts syndrome.
So in the event of me having wrinkly shorts AND having a curling iron in my hand i thought "oh hey guess what's a really great idea? i am going to just hurry and iron my shorts while they're still on me with this circular pole of fiery death."
okay, those really weren't the real words in my head, because we all know i don't think with that many words. it was more like "wrinkle + hot thing = no wrinkle"
and then it happened. i was a careless fool who didn't think about the fact that in a split second this pole of fiery death could (and would) burn my very flesh. and that's exactly what it did. i am pretty positive it burned a hole all the way to my very core. (aka my bones) and so i developed this awful hole in my leg that still, a week later, refuses to heal. and it hurts. so i am in desperate need of a wheelchair. and probably all things chocolate :) yaayyy chocolate!
also, i would show you a picture but i know you ALL would barf on yourselves seventeen times because it is that disgusting. so just know that i am saving your life.
once upon a time i was really happy because it was FINALLY warm enough to wear shorts outside. so i did just that. i got my hot pants on and was strutting my stuff all over the place. and then it was friday and i was bored in orem so i decided to go play with my sister and her friend for a while. we ate ice cream and did girl things. it was a jolly good time. THEN my little sisters friend was like "oh hey i think it's a really good idea to curl my hair" and i was all "oh my gosh! i miss doing that! let me do it! please please pleaseeeeee!"
so she did.
except i had to hurry because i had to go and meet some friends at nicklecade. so i hurried and got all done and then stood up from the chair and my stupid shorts got soo wrinkly. and then i was like "whatever i don't have time to iron them! it's fine!" but no. i looked in the mirror and almost ran away from embarrassment of wrinkly shorts syndrome.
So in the event of me having wrinkly shorts AND having a curling iron in my hand i thought "oh hey guess what's a really great idea? i am going to just hurry and iron my shorts while they're still on me with this circular pole of fiery death."
okay, those really weren't the real words in my head, because we all know i don't think with that many words. it was more like "wrinkle + hot thing = no wrinkle"
and then it happened. i was a careless fool who didn't think about the fact that in a split second this pole of fiery death could (and would) burn my very flesh. and that's exactly what it did. i am pretty positive it burned a hole all the way to my very core. (aka my bones) and so i developed this awful hole in my leg that still, a week later, refuses to heal. and it hurts. so i am in desperate need of a wheelchair. and probably all things chocolate :) yaayyy chocolate!
also, i would show you a picture but i know you ALL would barf on yourselves seventeen times because it is that disgusting. so just know that i am saving your life.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
secrets
i have a secret that i feel like i want to tell someone. but i feel kinda silly saying it with words, so i will type it into cyberspace and nobody will remember.
i have such a fond love for string cheese. i literally crave it every second of every day. sometimes i day dream about it.
i am being serious you guys. i walk around school thinking about it. i sit in bed and think about it. always. i love it. and dont you dare ask me why i love it so much, because really i dont have an answer. i just want to eat it 24/7.
i have such a fond love for string cheese. i literally crave it every second of every day. sometimes i day dream about it.
i am being serious you guys. i walk around school thinking about it. i sit in bed and think about it. always. i love it. and dont you dare ask me why i love it so much, because really i dont have an answer. i just want to eat it 24/7.
Sunday, March 6, 2011
the weirdest thing...
i'll be the first to say that my life is full of probably the weirdest most awkward things EVER. and i feel like i've done and adequate job of sharing these experiences with you, so i would only be doing you a favor by telling you what just happened to me...
about 1 am i am driving from salt lake to orem, and i was in the home stretch of getting to my home when in the distance i saw a ZILLION police cars/ambulances/ traffic jam. so many thoughts ran through my head, and i was sure i was going to look out my window and see a dead body on the road and some terrifying car crash. but the closer i got to the scene, the weirder things got.
i saw giant creatures in the middle of the road. first i thought it was a pile of dead bodies covered in a blanket. but that was kinda a silly thought. then i thought it was deer because, we all know that dear love running around on the freeway in the middle of the night. but no. the truthful thing that it was is 10 times weirder then you could ever imagine. they were HORSES. not just like one random horse that got away while delivering mail for the pony express. oh no. it was a group of like 6 horses all in one area. those poor lil guys. their hoofs were in the air. and their blood and guts were all over the freeway. i guess the accident had just barely happened because it was one heck of a time trying to maneuver my car around these bloody dead horses.
this was traumatic. i thought i was going to puke or something..and then i thought about all the guts that got stuck in the cracks of my tires and i got even more upset. HOW IN THE WORLD DID THESE HORSES GET THERE!? and then i drove a little further forward for like 3 minutes, and there was another random dead horse! this one was the worst because i saw its poor little face! i mean, as much as i hate horses with all the fibers of my soul, i hate the fact that i saw them dead. and bloody. and gutty. and disgusting. i am truly scarred for life. i cant stop thinking about it.
so i was all stressed out about the horses when out of nowhere this cop starts running towards me with his flashlight just a waving in the air. i about had a brain attack with all the flashing lights, seriously. do police men not understand that all their flashing bidness is about to give me a seizure. but he was just warning me that there were people on the side of the road and i needed to get to the other side of the freeway. so i had to be like stunt driver expert and get around the bloody horse, while dodging the freaking out people on the side of the road. and their cars. i'd like to call myself really cool for experiencing this. i only wish i had a camera. or someone with me to experience it. i feel like my writing just doesnt do it justice.
this reminds me of an experience i had recently. and since my brain is going 238723 miles an hour due to the gory night i had, i think i will tell you this other weird story. which isnt as weird, but it sure as heck shook me up.
one saturday morning i was driving to work. i was unhappy about the circumstances i was in. mostly because it was saturday morning, and i had to go to work. but anyways, that's besides the point. all you need to know is that i was driving. on a semi busy road. but since it was so early, there were like 3 cars driving. all of a sudden out of nowhere this gigantic truck pulls in front of me. this was no normal truck, they were pulling a huge flat bed trailer with LITERALLY 70 dead deer piled on top. they didnt have the decency to cover the poor things up with a tarp or a blanket, or like tissues or anything! so there i am staring these dead things in the eyes, and i was freaking out. i kept closing my eyes because i would rather be in a car accident then have to think about these dead guys. except not all of them were guys. because i tried to pass the truck, and they were going kinda over the speed limit, so to pass them i would have to go really fast. except i just thought to myself that if i got pulled over i would just tell the police man about the freakyness of those scary dead animals and he would TOTALLY understand. except i didnt get pulled over.
but. in the act of me trying to pass this truck, i pulled up next to the trailer and what did i see but only the worlds grossest bloody deer vag (ehm. i mean, butt.) seriously though. what the heck. who drives around at 8 in the morning with 70 dead deer hooked to the back of their truck?
nasty nast.
i cant stop thinking about all the blood and guts all over the road. and stuck in the tires of my car. oh dear. i know i am having some freaky dreams tonight, that's for sure. if anyone finds a news story about those dear sweet horses, will you send me the link? i gotta know what happened!
about 1 am i am driving from salt lake to orem, and i was in the home stretch of getting to my home when in the distance i saw a ZILLION police cars/ambulances/ traffic jam. so many thoughts ran through my head, and i was sure i was going to look out my window and see a dead body on the road and some terrifying car crash. but the closer i got to the scene, the weirder things got.
i saw giant creatures in the middle of the road. first i thought it was a pile of dead bodies covered in a blanket. but that was kinda a silly thought. then i thought it was deer because, we all know that dear love running around on the freeway in the middle of the night. but no. the truthful thing that it was is 10 times weirder then you could ever imagine. they were HORSES. not just like one random horse that got away while delivering mail for the pony express. oh no. it was a group of like 6 horses all in one area. those poor lil guys. their hoofs were in the air. and their blood and guts were all over the freeway. i guess the accident had just barely happened because it was one heck of a time trying to maneuver my car around these bloody dead horses.
this was traumatic. i thought i was going to puke or something..and then i thought about all the guts that got stuck in the cracks of my tires and i got even more upset. HOW IN THE WORLD DID THESE HORSES GET THERE!? and then i drove a little further forward for like 3 minutes, and there was another random dead horse! this one was the worst because i saw its poor little face! i mean, as much as i hate horses with all the fibers of my soul, i hate the fact that i saw them dead. and bloody. and gutty. and disgusting. i am truly scarred for life. i cant stop thinking about it.
so i was all stressed out about the horses when out of nowhere this cop starts running towards me with his flashlight just a waving in the air. i about had a brain attack with all the flashing lights, seriously. do police men not understand that all their flashing bidness is about to give me a seizure. but he was just warning me that there were people on the side of the road and i needed to get to the other side of the freeway. so i had to be like stunt driver expert and get around the bloody horse, while dodging the freaking out people on the side of the road. and their cars. i'd like to call myself really cool for experiencing this. i only wish i had a camera. or someone with me to experience it. i feel like my writing just doesnt do it justice.
this reminds me of an experience i had recently. and since my brain is going 238723 miles an hour due to the gory night i had, i think i will tell you this other weird story. which isnt as weird, but it sure as heck shook me up.
one saturday morning i was driving to work. i was unhappy about the circumstances i was in. mostly because it was saturday morning, and i had to go to work. but anyways, that's besides the point. all you need to know is that i was driving. on a semi busy road. but since it was so early, there were like 3 cars driving. all of a sudden out of nowhere this gigantic truck pulls in front of me. this was no normal truck, they were pulling a huge flat bed trailer with LITERALLY 70 dead deer piled on top. they didnt have the decency to cover the poor things up with a tarp or a blanket, or like tissues or anything! so there i am staring these dead things in the eyes, and i was freaking out. i kept closing my eyes because i would rather be in a car accident then have to think about these dead guys. except not all of them were guys. because i tried to pass the truck, and they were going kinda over the speed limit, so to pass them i would have to go really fast. except i just thought to myself that if i got pulled over i would just tell the police man about the freakyness of those scary dead animals and he would TOTALLY understand. except i didnt get pulled over.
but. in the act of me trying to pass this truck, i pulled up next to the trailer and what did i see but only the worlds grossest bloody deer vag (ehm. i mean, butt.) seriously though. what the heck. who drives around at 8 in the morning with 70 dead deer hooked to the back of their truck?
nasty nast.
i cant stop thinking about all the blood and guts all over the road. and stuck in the tires of my car. oh dear. i know i am having some freaky dreams tonight, that's for sure. if anyone finds a news story about those dear sweet horses, will you send me the link? i gotta know what happened!
Thursday, March 3, 2011
3 funny things
wanna know 3 funny things that happened?
1. i am at the library (i swear weird things happen to me here all the time. by the way i write, you'd probably think ALL i do is sit at the library and watch weird people. well it's not true. i do homework too. i just have ADD so homework turns into people watching/blog writing/ facebook stalking time.) anyways, i am at the library. just a sittin and a workin. and there is this really gross couple sitting near me. they're all over each other and yuck. they're watching a movie or something, who knows. she keeps clipping her fingernails, and if there is ONE sound in the entire world that i hate, that would be it. and she is not wearing shoes. and her toes are really just grossing me out. and he just has..unruly hair. THEN. she does the nastyest nast thing in the world. she pulls a box of tissues out from her backpack. normally, this wouldn't make me throw up in my purse but she starts blowing her nose and i can SEE the boogers in the tissue. that made me sick. but dont worry, folks, it gets worse. after she blows all those nasty sticky boogers into her tissue SHE PUTS IT ON HIS LAP! who in the right mind would deal with someone like this?! i mean, not to be rude or anything but i dont care who it is, i do not want your nasty boogs on my arm.
okay, so much for 3 funny things. i have to finish my paper. sorry, folks ;)
1. i am at the library (i swear weird things happen to me here all the time. by the way i write, you'd probably think ALL i do is sit at the library and watch weird people. well it's not true. i do homework too. i just have ADD so homework turns into people watching/blog writing/ facebook stalking time.) anyways, i am at the library. just a sittin and a workin. and there is this really gross couple sitting near me. they're all over each other and yuck. they're watching a movie or something, who knows. she keeps clipping her fingernails, and if there is ONE sound in the entire world that i hate, that would be it. and she is not wearing shoes. and her toes are really just grossing me out. and he just has..unruly hair. THEN. she does the nastyest nast thing in the world. she pulls a box of tissues out from her backpack. normally, this wouldn't make me throw up in my purse but she starts blowing her nose and i can SEE the boogers in the tissue. that made me sick. but dont worry, folks, it gets worse. after she blows all those nasty sticky boogers into her tissue SHE PUTS IT ON HIS LAP! who in the right mind would deal with someone like this?! i mean, not to be rude or anything but i dont care who it is, i do not want your nasty boogs on my arm.
okay, so much for 3 funny things. i have to finish my paper. sorry, folks ;)
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